Humor
Whaddya Say And How Do Ya Say It?
May 16, 2016 
Get out your dictionaries and get ready to do battle!
With the micro inspection of all the politicos and the outpouring of political correctness it has become nearly impossible to speak or even go to the toilet without offending someone.
For the sake of stimulating conversation we will offer some examples of “wrong talk.” We speak not of intentional bashing, baiting, or mean spirited use of the English language. Just some of the new terms and situations that create tensions.
A student who is above average intelligence is “gifted and talented.” That student often takes “advance placement” classes. It is considered totally insensitive to use “slow, dumb, stupid, lazy, or god forbid the opposite of advance “R” word.
-A person who cannot hear is never deaf.
-A person who cannot walk is never crippled (although polio is a crippling disease).
-People from Mexico are not called “Mexicans,” they somehow become hispanic or latino. However someone from France is “french” and Germany has “Germans.”
–A man from England is an “Englishman,” but it is considered racist to refer to a male
from China as a “Chinaman.” Asian seems the current favorite.
–Caucasians of European ancestry are “white.” Negro is the black opposite of caucasian and “colored” is taboo despite the official name of the NAACP. (National Association for Advancement of Colored People.
–Mexicans, Mid-eastern, and other brown skinned people are “people of color.” Never
say, “Arab-looking.”
–Despite the Bureau of Indian Affairs, Indian crafts, and casinos, those people are “Native Americans,” not to be confused with “African-Americans.
–Then we have the issue of “self-identifying” gender identity. Can a high school junior go to the girls locker room on a whim because he “self identified?”
–We can remember when LGBT mean lettuce, guacamole, bacon and tomato on a sandwich rather than code for sexual identity.
–We haven’t seen any women using urinals, but then again any man will tell you it’s bad form to peek at the person next to you…ALWAYS stare straight ahead!
Male, female, Christian, atheist, Republican, Democrat, today life in America is to skate on thin ice. If you or your group was mentioned above and you didn’t like it, we offer a blanket apology.
We welcome reader comments, but will not post anything obviously rude or distasteful.
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Comments & Discussion
Comments are closed for this post.
May 16, 2016, 6:29 pm
You won’t publish distasteful comments yet you’re fine with this distasteful, and more importantly, irrelevant post. Is it appropriate to call this ‘reporting’ juvenile?
May 16, 2016, 6:34 pm
…gotta luv that LGBT sandwich…!
EDITOR NOTE–Honestly saw it happen! Lady wanted a BLT with avocado and waitress said they only had guacamole. Lady said OK. They still talk about the woman who ordered the LGBT sandwich.
May 16, 2016, 6:35 pm
I’d like mine on wry, please.
May 16, 2016, 7:25 pm
I think “B” meant to say “irreverent.”
Irregardless, our Guardian would never be irreverent, or irrelevant.
EDITOR NOTE–Rather than be goaded into this debate, I will merely point out:
OxfordDictionaries.com
Irregardless means the same as regardless, but the negative prefix ir- merely duplicates the suffix -less, and is unnecessary.
May 16, 2016, 8:10 pm
Political Correctness is a cancer that has been eating away at common sense in our society for many years. I am not much for conspiracy theories, but I believe that our government has been nurturing this idea for years as a way of pushing a liberal agenda. Our universities train the latest flock of 18 year olds that everything is offensive. I call BS! I say the whole group of them are retarded!
May 16, 2016, 8:24 pm
I’m guessing that our society is probably the thinnest-skinned on the planet, and in all of history!
A number of years ago, I spent some time in Uruguay, South America. Down there, they use common adjectives as nicknames:
– Che rubio (blond guy)
– Che negro (dark guy)
– Che gordo (fat guy)
– Che flaco (skinny guy)
– Che feo (ugly guy)
I was often called “el gordo” because I was, and am, bigger around than the average Uruguayo.
Being offended is a choice that the hearer or viewer makes. It’s silly to take offense when no offense is intended… and if somebody means to offend and I choose not to be offended, then I win! (Seems to me…)
May 16, 2016, 8:42 pm
Our corporate masters like meek little Sheeple who work till they die, and keep their mouth shut. Freedom of thought and speech are to be punished, and the offensive oaf ostracized. Government officials will soon have us wear mandatory GPS tracking collars that monitor our conversations, while transmitting realtime video of our actions. …for your “safety”, of course. We get a little closer to 1984 every day.
May 16, 2016, 10:05 pm
As I understand it, if one consistently self-identifies (regardless of what stage of transition from the birth gender-identity to the self-identified gender-identity) one should be allowed to use the self-identified gender bathroom facility. Whims NOT allowed.
Much of all this turmoil is related to allowing people to live without discrimination and with equal freedoms as anybody else. Some people resist change, even if it does them no harm.
May 16, 2016, 10:41 pm
It’s all about pelvic rights and very predictable voting of nearly all women and their neutered men.
With total control of their pelvic region and all that which is related to it, American females have become obsessed with the power of their magic box. What was once a tremendous burden can now be used as an instant cash machine and so much more.
So addictive is the power of the magic box, it has caused nearly all women to vote to preserve and enhance its power no matter how deep and stinky the other social sewage and politic tied to it.
The commitment to the pelvis is the prime directive for all American females. Even the GOP has yielded and been compelled to attract its voting power.
And that my friends, and enemies, is how America came to be the failing sniveling embarasing nation we are today. Not since Eisenhower have we had a President and political parties which did not pay homage to the magic box. It is the greatest power in the land.
Thank you so much for such predictable voting habits ladies. You’ve single handedly destroyed the western world with only 45 years of supreme and selfish pelvic rights. I wonder if Islam will continue to allow you to have such power. Watch Europe for the answer.
May 17, 2016, 6:29 am
I was in an elevator yesterday with three I’m thinking college kids who must have been talking about grades (do they still have such things that are meaningful?). One female was whining about how her teacher was so mysogynistic. Why she (? A mysogynistic woman) dared give the snowflake a 77! The horror.
I’m thinking the teacher was not really a woman hater, she just hated that woman. Or maybe the student really wasn’t very good.
May 17, 2016, 9:39 am
Clearly written by someone in the older generation lamenting over the past. I bet your grandparents thought the world was going to hell in a hand basket. The world changes and evolves and in most cases becomes a better place. “get busy living, or get busy dying”.
EDITOR NOTE–You clearly do not respect your elders for their wisdom. Knowledge is learned, but wisdom comes with age.
May 17, 2016, 9:50 am
I personally believe that there was a legitimate need to address certain disrespectful uses of language (the N word and the like). But, it seems that at this point, there has been a concerted effort to take complete control of all things linguistic and establish an official lexicon that the political class uses to steer debates and indoctrinate the masses. It is a sophisticated form of social engineering that one could understandably infer as Orwellian. Some of it is rooted in a legitimate cause of righting certain wrongs of our past and current disparities, but the shotgun approach utilized makes villains out of many people who never asked to be a part of any culture war and have even tried to assist in the righting of said wrongs. What has resulted is a blanket condemnation of anyone who identifies as a “conservative” and praises anyone who identifies as a “liberal.” It’s a classic divided and conquer tactic. Most people are a mix of “isms” but are forced to choose only one ism flag to fly. I refuse to do that. I will not be controlled. Political Correctness hi-jacked a worthy notion just as markets have been hi-jacked by elite cronyism.
I believe that Obama is using this mandated bathroom edit for purely culture war concerns, not civil rights, which his foreign policies show that he has no interest in. He is stirring the Right vs Left conflict paradigm.
May 17, 2016, 10:10 am
Good one.
My pet peeve is the use of Gay and Lesbian together.
The person saying that ought to say, “I am stupid and ignore the definitions of words”
How about these:
The Asians and the Chinese make tasty food.
The Latinos and the Mexicans are fun people.
All Idahoans and Boiseans are so smart.
And then someone wants to formalize it like GLAAD.
Think about it! Ya homos! 🙂
Barry Obama, in 2004 said, “I have been very clear on this, I have said I am not a supporter of gay marriage.”
— Okay, then what about “lesbian marriage”? Ha!
And why does Obama get labeled as a black man? Do you order a chocolate and vanilla swirl ice cream cone and call it a chocolate cone?
When has the media referred to Obama as the “first Mulatto President”?
That is closely followed by the hyphenated Americans. If someone doesn’t have DUAL citizenship they are NOT a hyphenated nationality.
Dumb!
May 17, 2016, 10:47 am
I hate this but it is offensive to hate anything. Two wrongs make two wrongs. Since the feds believe felons are now people with a criminal past, murderers will soon be people who’ve previously killed someone. My penis is my member but membership is exclusionary so must include a vagina, also called a member so as not to discriminate, although having not included their multi-gender enabled bipeds of unknown origin, said membership is even more exclusionary and subject to a lawsuit.
Together two members form a club which is also exclusionary unless one is a member with a posterior orifice in which case we should just call it a politician. It’s all quite amusingly ridiculous but if you laugh at it you suffer from a disorder for which you may receive medication.
I can’t keep up.
May 17, 2016, 11:37 am
emily, hon, get busy working. You’ve got a lot of bills to pay which are not yours but for the socialism you enjoy so much.
May 17, 2016, 1:38 pm
Emily.. don’t listen to the editor. A lot of what your elders know is wrong. Most of us aren’t that wise either.
May 17, 2016, 2:55 pm
RANDOM
Hispanic and Latino are broad terms. Mexican, Cuban, Dominican, Puerto Rican are specific. You can identify as a Mexican-American, Cuban-American. You don’t hear Hispanic-American.
N-word was common. Ask your grandparents. It evolved to be derogatory…unless you are part of the black community, where it is a term of endearment.
Vernacular changes, we too change with the time.
Black replaced colored. My Dad forced me to change “colored” from conversation about school by interrupting me with “what color?” every time I used it. My friends were black, not colored, and identified as such.
Three of the ten dash-denoted comments from the editor relate to gender issues. Conservative Boise seems to be squeamish. Get over it?
Transgender people make up from .3% to .5% of our population. That’s 3 to 5 of every 1000 people. Is this really the biggest event of the day?
Why does gender fluidity create fear, and since when did variations on gender identity become a safety issue in our bathrooms? As far as I know, assaulting anyone of any sex in any bathroom has and always will be illegal.
Easterner: Your “h” word IS derogatory as written. I feel you know it, as does editor who allowed it.
May 18, 2016, 9:17 am
Isn’t democracy wonderful? It’s peachy keen, that is until you find yourself on the wrong side of an issue and then it’s infuriating. Wrong side means in the minority. And by minority, I don’t mean a class of people, I mean numbers. Plain simple percentages.
Less than 1% of the population can demand the 99% spend millions towards accommodation of the 1%? Good thing minorities don’t have to meet that supermajority requirement to get their pet tax funded issues funded.
This sounds like the bike lane thing. A tiny minority can bite off more than their fair share of society’s resources.
I have no problems whatsoever with LGBT, but the reality is $millions will have to be spent to either 1) make all bathrooms unisex or 2) make a third bathroom in 10s of thousands of schools and other public buildings.
Meanwhile, the sidewalk on Jefferson by Whittier Elementary is still missing 4 years after completion of Whitewater Parkway. North Junior High still has no traffic light at Fort and 15th even though kids are forced to go to school in the dark in the winter. CWI’s campus-to-be is a junk yard for the Main Street Auction folks.
I’m glad we have infinite money so even my minority position on the issues can be catered to.
May 18, 2016, 11:16 am
boisecynic,
What you say is true, but only because the judicial and executive branches are being abused by our over abundance of lawyers.
Constitutionally, the legislative (the people) branch should be the bottom line. The executive can veto and the courts can rule yes or no, but congress should run the show.
However due to an out of control bio-film of lawyers slithering around in all branches of government we have activists courts going well beyond simple rulings, and an obscene excess power in the executive branch enforcing uncontested dictatorial policy.
We also have a massively unhappy public and government for the government paid for by the underrepresented and over-taxed people.
It’s only a matter of time before the fires of anarchy and revolution burn brightly. Many a fool points to the success of Europe without understanding all of Western Europe was a US cold-war puppet state until about 1995. It’s now disintegrating from the liberalism these fools celebrate and force upon the USA with the corrupt use of courts and executive.
May 18, 2016, 12:04 pm
Foothills Rider, I think you may have skipped over the Guardian’s first point in order to count the number of gender references.
Here it is again: “it has become nearly impossible to speak or even go to the toilet without offending someone.”
It’s always nice when politically correct people prove a point to their own incorrectness. Such as they thought of “you don’t hear Hispanic-American”…
Well that depends on where you are listening. Here for example, our official government uses it:
https://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/hispanicamericanhealth.html
More fun reading on the Hispanic/Latino use
http://www.cnn.com/2014/05/03/living/hispanic-latino-identity/
Conclusion? It is the people who feel they are being verbally assaulted that are the worse for perpetuating the problem. Get over it?
btw the use of any of the “__- word” is also offensive.
Maybe the thought is not vulgar if I use a substitute-hyphenated letter?
May 18, 2016, 4:23 pm
It all can be confusing especially when one segment (race/Sex) can use the “offending” word and another cannot. Barry Bonds has a problem with some kids singing a song…..why not take issue with guy who is making money off of it?
https://twitter.com/BarryBonds/status/732421761652916225
May 18, 2016, 7:03 pm
I self identify as allergic to taxes and I really appreciatte the rest of you paying my share to accommodate me.
In this regard be are both stunning and brave!
May 19, 2016, 1:12 pm
Guardian, your worst post ever only exceeded by the many inane comments it has illicited. So many friggin theories (espoused as fact) on what is wrong with our society. It seems as if many of those posting will only be happy if everything goes to sh@t tomorrow. The glass is always half empty to most of those posting on this topic. Time to turn survivalists?
May 19, 2016, 9:15 pm
Taxed out – In a time of universal deciept, all we have are “theories”. You and Obama be peddlin fiction… Happy unicorn and rainbow hunting to you. Personally, I love controversial topics and the wonderful non-corporate sponsored content they generate.
May 20, 2016, 2:14 pm
This is definitely a column for the times. Two scary terms are “micro-aggression” and “trigger warning.”
A trigger warning is a warning that you may say something that someone might find objectionable. It gives them a chance to leave the room, or prepare themselves emotionally for the statement you may make. In theory trigger warnings are needed because of the sensitivities of our younger generations, which (insert trigger warning) actually is a very poor poor reflection on their lack of character, lack of self-respect, lack of motivation, and lack of American grit.
Oops, that may have been a micro-aggression, which I no longer need to define.
The way out of all of this is to say what we mean, be precise with our language, be kind and gracious, but stand for what we believe and say and not back down over properly used words.
EDITOR NOTE–Well said! One of my favorite inflammatory AND precise words is “SCHEME” as in “Bieter’s trolley scheme.” Defined as:
http://www.dictionary.com/browse/scheme
a plan, program, or policy officially adopted and followed, as by a government or business: The company’s pension scheme is very successful.
May 21, 2016, 8:52 am
Really slow news day…