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City Government

Carpet Review Take Two

 January 14, 2008 ⋅  Post a comment

Here is a GUARDIAN READER shot of the new carpet in City Hall which caused the great phone call to the Mayor’s hot line…we reprinted the transcript as well.

1/3/07
Anonymous
New Carpet: I’m calling in regards to the embarrassingly hideous carpet in city hall. I recently visited the third floor and I got out of the elevator and was completely nauseated to see the carpet. On the first floor, there isn’t that much carpet, but what there was seemed ugly but not that bad. On the third floor it was weakening; I had to sit down to regain my balance and I couldn’t possibly imagine how anybody thought it was a good idea to install flooring that was like moldy tetra. I halfway expected to hear Fleetwood Mac playing. Not only does the carpet scream, an engineer showed me it’s reminiscent of a killer mutant virus, and that unless you possess a super charged immune system, it will suck every drop of energy out of each of your cells until you are completely incapacitated by its repulsiveness. I actually was terrified that the parasitic worm design was going to crawl out of the floor and under my skin. I realize this sounds suspiciously like I was under the influence, which I would like to clarify that I was not, but if I had been, I would never have made it out of the elevator. I suppose that if the decorator’s intent was to keep intoxicated citizens out of the mayor’s office, or was a subversive attempt to create effusiveness in the city council members, then he or she was pretty successful. However, if the intent was to create a sophisticated and urban reflection of what we hope our city grows into, I think it was a shameful and tacky failure. Thank you.

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