The new year resolution list hasn’t changed, so we will gladly post anything you wish to add.
The GUARDIAN promises to at least try to have a more positive attitude during the coming year. One step in that direction would be fulfilling the following list of New Year’s resolutions:
–Boise city council will abandon any plans for a trolley or any other permanent tracks in our streets.
–Taxes will be reduced across the board at the state and local level.
–The Idaho legislature leaves town after a month with improvements to education funding and eliminates corporate welfare programs.
–Downtown Boise streets are restored to previous widths by eliminating ALL street closures for hotels, convention centers, etc.
–Annexation laws are changed to allow both city residents and future residents to vote with approval of both groups required.
–Local TV news shows will not be allowed to ask questions about weather (will it snow?) and weather segments will be limited to 1 minute per broadcast.
–Idaho Statesman’s front page cannot feature any story or photo more than 24 hours old.
–All bicyclists wearing dark clothing at night with no lights on a bike shall serve mandatory prison sentence of 10 years.
–All politicos shall be limited to one term in any office with no retirement programs.
–When political campaign funds accumulate to an amount deemed by the GUARDIAN to be excessive, the money goes to the general fund of the city, county, or state.
–Anyone using the term “most livable city” shall be forced to write “I will never say most livable again” 100 times in cursive.
–Anything Kardashian shall be declared “terrorist” and blown up. Any news media publishing or airing images or words on the topic shall be banned.
Those are just a few of the resolutions we would like to see in the next 12 months in an effort to make this a better and happier world. Happy New Year to one and all.
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